So this is my last Monday off before I revert back to a normal M - F work schedule. Instead of doing anything remotely productive I've blown a good portion of my afternoon playing the Apple II version of Oregon Trail on an emulator. I named every person in my party after members of the Bush administration and sent them off on the trail late in the season with limited supplies.

Despite all that, everybody made it to the Willamette but Dick Cheney. He suffered an unfortunate accident as the party attempted to ford a river in Kansas. Sorry Dick. For Round 2 I'll give my hearty pioneers the same names I did back in third grade. Good, wholesome, all-American and less likely to land me in a secret prison names like "Poopy Butt" and "Diarrhea."

So all this nostalgia has got me thinking that this old elementary school classic would make great fodder for a Decemberists' song. It's got all the elements: oddball 19th century historical tidbits, violence and assorted grimness. Text from the game like "_______ has died of dysentery" and "you have shot 965 pounds of bear meat but can only carry 100 back to the wagon" would make great lyrics.

Or not. Nonetheless, here's hoping a song with a title like "A Thief Has Stolen a Wagon Wheel and Two Sets of Clothing" gets unveiled when the band plays the Crystal Ballroom later this month.

Labels: music, video games