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Another Portland Blog

Thursday, May 31, 2007

 

Plutonium in my bushes

Check out what I found sitting in my front yard when I got home from work tonight:




So I did what any normal person would do after finding a mysterious cooler sitting just across their property line- I ran a Google search on "Metro MBI" and "Portland." The query results were all over the place, ranging from an office supply dealer operating out of Seattle and a company that sells concrete.

This wouldn't be the first time someone has dumped something unusual in my yard for reasons unknown. After a few seconds of careful contemplation, I headed back outside, ignored the owner's vague request that I leave the cooler alone and opened it. What was inside?




Six cylindrical metal tubes the width of tuna cans sitting in murky water. One word immediately sprung to mind: plutonium. I knew I should have put on my radiation suit before cracking it open. Now is probably the time to invest in a DeLorean and a flux capacitor.

There's a good chance that the cooler has something to do with a house being built across the street. Still, what practical purpose could it serve? Maybe the builders just like to keep their unlabeled, half-gallon cans of tuna lukewarm.

Creepy, no? If I start glowing in the dark or find myself on myself a prisoner on a mysterious island tomorrow morning, I'll know the reason why.

UPDATE: Thanks to Bojack and his readers, the likely owner of the cooler has been determined. It probably belongs to Morse Bros. Inc Quality Control and contains concrete test samples. Why it was placed in my yard instead of the construction site across the street remains a mystery.

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