I was a pre-teen video game junkie. A good portion of my waking hours were spent parked in front of an NES between the ages of 8 and 12. I lost somewhere in the neighborhood of six months worth of waking hours in front of games like Baseball Stars and the first installment of the Final Fantasy Hey, it was the late '80s. Everybody was doing it.

Things like employment and alcohol now keep me from spending five hours a day with a gamepad in my hand but I still enjoy the occasional romp in the hay o' pixels. The latest game that has me on the verge of quitting my job and becoming a shut-in? God of War II.

I've only played the first level but it contains more over-the-top violence in it than some entire games. You play as Kratos, a god o' war lording over a version of ancient Greece that makes the one in 300 look like a drawing in the world's dullest text book. In the space of five minutes, Kratos goes from lounging around his palace on Mount Olympus to fully engaged in a fight to the death with a Colossus statue brought to life. Of course, this is set against the backdrop of a massive Spartan raid on Rhodes. I could tell you more about God of War 2 but this Penny Arcade strip sums it all up nicely.

"Every other game is the joke. God of War [2] is the punchline." Indeed. Athena? Zeus?! WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?! WTF, guys, WTF?

Labels: geek, stuff