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Another Portland Blog

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

 

Give a Hoot(ers)

Back in May I wrote a review of the Beaverton Hooters. Sometime later, a Hooters girl complained about it. Now a second employee named Liza has written in to set the record straight on everybody's favorite family-friendly T&A franchise:

Along with Adirenne i too am a hooter girl, but not at beaverton. Most people like coming to hooters instead of strip clubs because we're friendly, self respecting, and really work to make it a different, fun enviroment from, lets say, the Olive Garden.

Also, some people would rather go to a resteraunt where they can eat, relax, look at pretty girls and not have them shove their hoo ha's in your face while trying to scheme a dance from you. Bottem line, we're friendly, happy, outgoing girls, and although we do have people, like yourself, who don't like us, we also have a huge fan base who loves us.

So maybe you just got a not so good hooter girl or the cooks were having a bad day, it happens, but don't black list a place you've only been to once, especially when there is an entirely other location in the same area. I hate the KFC on 50th and Powell, but that doesn't stop me from going to the one on Sandy instead. Give it another shot, order a different entree if you didn't like the one you ordered before, go to a different location, but don't be a hater, please! :)"




Here's my response, written in Dr. Suess verse, because, well, you know:

I'll never go back to the Beaverton Hooters

I will not go back there in a motorboat
I will not go back there with a coyote

I will never again eat its chicken wings
That taste just like wooden siding

Yep, the atmosphere is bland at the Olive Garden
But their food is good so they get a pardon

I'll never order another beer from Hooters' two beer beer menu
Or gaze upon those t-shirts that aren't even see-thru

I'll never go back with a dollar in my hand
A dollar that belongs in a legitimate stripper's g-string band

I hate the Beaverton Hooters....


...Ok, I couldn't come up with a final line. If you have any suggestions feel free to toss them in the feedback area below.

While I'm on the subject, here, compliments of Phil Stanford, is an update on the Hooters destined to replace the historic Waddle's coffeeshop in Jantzen Beach.


Construction on the new I-5 Hooters - at the foot of the bridge where Waddles used to be - is bouncing along just fine, thank you very much. Mark Bruun of Lorentz Bruun Construction says the restaurant with the winking hootie owl for a logo should be up and running in about four months.


I say there's still time to bring back the duck with the bib.

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