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Another Portland Blog

Thursday, March 17, 2005

 

Beer blasphemy + a daring experiment

You've got to be kidding! The race was fixed! A Guinness drinker must have hacked the poll and skewed the results! There's simply no way that Corona, the God of Beers, could be defeated by Guinness, the Sewer Treatment Plant Manager of Beers.

But them's the breaks. Corona was shot down 17 - 3 in Welcome to Blog's recent beer poll. It was even beat by the third party candidate, whiskey.

Still, to conduct a controversial poll like this at the height of St. Patrick's eason is akin to asking: "Who's the better holiday icon: Santa Clause, the Easter Bunny or the Arbor Day Ferret" on December 24th. If I were to conduct this same poll during the week of Cinco de Mayo the results would have turned out different, no doubt.

Can 25 readers of this blog be wrong? Maybe but there has to be something I'm missing here. Guinness is thick, bitter and tastes like death, as far as I'm concerned. Still, maybe there's a way I can improve it, to make it drinkable (for me at least)- a way to make Guinness better, stronger, faster and at least a little bit refreshing.

Tonight I'll conduct a daring St. Patty's experiment. What would happen if I mixed one part Corona with one part Guinness? My hypothesis is that the result will be a Half-God of Beers, a sort of Hercules brew. I will call this creation...

...A MICKICAN!.

Get it? Mexican ale + Irish stout = A MICKICAN, a hybrid Black and Tan that crosses the boundaries of the Atlantic and political correctness in a single pint glass. Great idea, huh? I should probably trademark the name before someone else cahses in on this positively brilliant idea.

The results of this bold, daring experiment in beer mixology will be revealed sometime in the next few days, with photos. Stay tuned.

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