April 2011

Another blog. About Portland. And other stuff too.

about | archives | twitter | flickr | potma | iphone snapshots | facebook | yelp
rss feed | youtube | links | the burning log


Questions? Comments? Reservations?
anotherportlandblog[at]gmail[dot]com

Another Portland Blog

Tuesday, August 31, 2004

 

A whole new taste sensation?




Of all the beers in all the world, I'm wiling to guess that Corona receives the most flack. It's watery, it's imported from a certain country below the Rio Grande and it's expensive. "Mexican piss water" is an oft-employed metaphor thrown out by drinkers that prefer their beer as thick as soup.

As someone who likes his beverages refreshing and as a beer consumer that would sooner eat a meal than drink Guinness, which is even thicker than one of those Jamba Juice things, I think they've got it all wrong. Granted, a Corona, by itself, is lighter and blander than air but with something like a lemon added it's pure bliss.

Corona is a beer pallet just waiting to be explored. While most will toss a lemon wedge down the neck of a bottle and call it a day, for me, that won't do. I'm as a bird, man, and, when it comes to adult beverages, this bird you cannot change, woohohohoh.

A few years ago, I experimented with and a Corona and bidi cigarette. Remember bidis? In the late '90s probably every news organization in the country ran a story on how they would corrupt the nation's youth and lure 95% of America's youth into the dark realm of daily tobacco use. Now, a few years later, you can only find them in specialty smoke shops. Go figure. I may be the only one in the states still smoking these things. What can I say, while they're difficult to keep lit, bidis taste great and they freak out the neighbors.

So, on a faithful evening during a trip to Oregon coast, I was suddenly inspired while sitting on the edge of Neakhanie Mountain, gazing at a very neat sunset. I took my wild cherry-flavored bidi, took a deep drag, blew the smoke in a half-filled Corona. The smoke hung in the bottle and the fading sunlit gave the bottle a mystical aura. I quickly drank the aura down, filling my soul with frothy, happy sunshine*. Wa-la! A brand new taste sensation: smoking and drinking at the same time. I should have patented the concept on the spot.

I've tried normal cigarettes but the mix tastes like a rusty tailpipe. Corona-smoking, for lack of a better term, is best with a bidi. Grab a pack of bidis, a six pack of Corona and a sunset and try it out sometime. You may be pleasantly surprised. If not, go back to your lame-o Budweiser, lame-o.

Despite this landmark achievement in beer drinking, I'm committed to finding new Corona avenues to explore. Currently, I'm trying to crossbreed the brand with Captain Crunch. If I can get the recipe just right I could start a fad and become the George Washington Carver of the Mexican beer world.

* Is this earnest? With a line like "frothy, happy sunshine"? Come on, give me some credit. I'd say this post is only 20-35% earnest.

Comments: Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]



Links to this post:

Create a Link



<< Home


SEARCH THIS BLOG? SURE, NO PROBLEMO, AS BART SIMPSON USED TO SAY....





www.flickr.com




-archives-

  • October 2003
  • November 2003
  • December 2003
  • January 2004
  • February 2004
  • March 2004
  • April 2004
  • May 2004
  • June 2004
  • July 2004
  • August 2004
  • September 2004
  • October 2004
  • November 2004
  • December 2004
  • January 2005
  • February 2005
  • March 2005
  • April 2005
  • May 2005
  • June 2005
  • July 2005
  • August 2005
  • September 2005
  • October 2005
  • November 2005
  • December 2005
  • January 2006
  • February 2006
  • March 2006
  • April 2006
  • May 2006
  • June 2006
  • July 2006
  • August 2006
  • September 2006
  • October 2006
  • November 2006
  • December 2006
  • January 2007
  • February 2007
  • March 2007
  • April 2007
  • May 2007
  • June 2007
  • July 2007
  • August 2007
  • September 2007
  • October 2007
  • November 2007
  • December 2007
  • January 2008
  • February 2008
  • March 2008
  • April 2008
  • May 2008
  • June 2008
  • July 2008
  • August 2008
  • September 2008
  • October 2008
  • November 2008
  • December 2008
  • January 2009
  • February 2009
  • March 2009
  • April 2009
  • May 2009
  • June 2009
  • July 2009
  • August 2009
  • October 2009
  • November 2009
  • December 2009
  • January 2010
  • February 2010
  • March 2010
  • April 2010
  • August 2010
  • September 2010
  • October 2010
  • November 2010
  • January 2011
  • February 2011
  • March 2011
  • April 2011

  • Clicky Web Analytics


    This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?