I was greeted at the door on Tuesday night by a smell like no other. This distinct potpurri was a combination of fresh garlic and stale milk. I immediately assumed it was the trash and took it out. Still, the scent lingered.

I did the smell test, sniffing around the room like the coked-up werewolf. There was no doubt. It was coming from the Xmas tree.

The little guy had shown remarkable resilience over the past months. It had dropped only a few needles and stayed relatively green. I could have tried changing the water but the fear that this thing was becoming a serious health hazard would have still lingered. Alas, there comes a time in every young man's life when he has to take down his first Xmas tree. Seeing that St. Patrick's Day was a few hours away, I finally relented.

So, for everyone keeping score, it lasted a grand total of 95 days, over three longer than your average Xmas tree. How long could it have gone had I changed the water? I guess we'll never know.

Regardless, is this a new record? Given that it was St. Patrick's, maybe I should contacted Guinness. Instead, I just drank one. Ba-du-dum-ba!