April 2011

Another blog. About Portland. And other stuff too.

about | archives | twitter | flickr | potma | iphone snapshots | facebook | yelp
rss feed | youtube | links | the burning log


Questions? Comments? Reservations?
anotherportlandblog[at]gmail[dot]com

Another Portland Blog

Thursday, February 12, 2004

 

Naughty! Naughty!

Since Armed Prophet's still down for the count after a mysterious one week absence, Blog has taken it upon himself to fill in with his own special blend of political pontificating.

Matt Drudge may have discovered another Monica bombshell. As posted on the Drudge Report today, undisclosed sources are claiming democratic frontrunner John Kerry has a bit of the ol' Billy Clinton charm running through his bloodstream.

A mysterious woman is currently being investigated by just about every news outlet imaginable for her "relationship" with Kerry. According to rumor, she even fled the country at one point to prevent their little secret from being leaked.

While I'm registered as an independent, much like your average Democrat I couldn't care less who takes the nomination, provided they stand a chance at beating George "Asexual Monkey Boy" Bush.

Is Kerry really the best candidate? I don't think so, mostly for frivolous reasons that, nevertheless, have the power to swing elections. First, he's from the north and southerners tend to vote for whatever side hails from below the Mason-Dixon line. His weak stance on national defense will only serve to further alienate middle America. Plus, as Bill Mahr is quick to point out, he looks like one of the talking trees from The Wizard of Oz.

John Edwards seems like the obvious choice. He hails from a small town in South Carolina and has the haircut of a Kennedy. And he has yet to have his picture taken with Jane Fonda.

As far as poo-tang goes, there really is no end to the double standard. GW's brother Neil (now under suspicion for insider trading), found himself in the middle of a nasty divorce last year. The reason why? He was caught in a hotel room with two Asian hookers. Here's an excerpt from the subsequent legal proceedings:

ATTORNEY: Mr. Bush, you have to admit it's a pretty remarkable thing for a man just to go to a hotel room door and open it and have a woman standing there and have sex with her.

NEIL BUSH: It was very unusual.

Replace GW with "Bill," "Neil" with "Roger" and jump back eight years and this all would provide endless fodder for Conan O'Brien. The big question here? Why can Republicans get away with infidelities that would make even Bill Clinton blush? Clinton was almost crucified for his Oval Office affair but little became of Arnie's endless extramarital shenanigans.

As of 4:30 PST, the big news outlets have yet to go near Drudge's allegations. If the suspicions surrounding Kerry are confirmed, he could find himself banished to the same political trash heap as Dean. Even if they aren't, Fox News and all the others will be like sharks in feeding frenzy over a drop of blood (well, in this case, a few drops of something else entirely). While Republicans may be willing to overlook the indiscretions of Arnold "Eating Ain't Cheating" Schwarzenegger, they'll have a field day with this one.

You hear that laughter? That's Europe. Get used to it.

Comments: Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]



Links to this post:

Create a Link



<< Home


SEARCH THIS BLOG? SURE, NO PROBLEMO, AS BART SIMPSON USED TO SAY....





www.flickr.com




-archives-

  • October 2003
  • November 2003
  • December 2003
  • January 2004
  • February 2004
  • March 2004
  • April 2004
  • May 2004
  • June 2004
  • July 2004
  • August 2004
  • September 2004
  • October 2004
  • November 2004
  • December 2004
  • January 2005
  • February 2005
  • March 2005
  • April 2005
  • May 2005
  • June 2005
  • July 2005
  • August 2005
  • September 2005
  • October 2005
  • November 2005
  • December 2005
  • January 2006
  • February 2006
  • March 2006
  • April 2006
  • May 2006
  • June 2006
  • July 2006
  • August 2006
  • September 2006
  • October 2006
  • November 2006
  • December 2006
  • January 2007
  • February 2007
  • March 2007
  • April 2007
  • May 2007
  • June 2007
  • July 2007
  • August 2007
  • September 2007
  • October 2007
  • November 2007
  • December 2007
  • January 2008
  • February 2008
  • March 2008
  • April 2008
  • May 2008
  • June 2008
  • July 2008
  • August 2008
  • September 2008
  • October 2008
  • November 2008
  • December 2008
  • January 2009
  • February 2009
  • March 2009
  • April 2009
  • May 2009
  • June 2009
  • July 2009
  • August 2009
  • October 2009
  • November 2009
  • December 2009
  • January 2010
  • February 2010
  • March 2010
  • April 2010
  • August 2010
  • September 2010
  • October 2010
  • November 2010
  • January 2011
  • February 2011
  • March 2011
  • April 2011

  • Clicky Web Analytics


    This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?